Letter: Eco-terrorism on the Coast—Part 2

Property owners on the Coast are not deterred by senseless attacks on their rights.  My For Sale sign on the west side of Railroad Avenue and Filbert is back up again and now the most fortified For Sale sign the Coast has ever seen.  It is now encased in over 230 pounds of concrete and proudly wears the number 3 indicating the number of times this sign has been righted.  I considered other safeguards but took a more measured response for now.

However,  I have retained a legion of Property Rights Protectors to help Tony sell his property.  I am pleased to introduce to the Coast NP3,  which stands for NO PUDS IN HMB.  This is not t o be confused with others using these sacred letters as they defile PUDs up and down the Coast such as No Pooping, No Puking or even Not Pitching.

The Coast is truly fortunate to have someone of his caliber preserving their diminishing rights 24/7.  NP3 graduated #1 in his class at Camp GITMO and has specialized in the highly controversial yet highly effective eco-terrorist fighting technique of weed boarding.

NP3 has also been given Executive Orders from VP Dick Cheeney to use this controversial technique to fight eco-extremism whenever he sees fit.  VP Cheeney was also so impressed with NP3’s take no survivor attitude that he invited him to accompany him on a recent hunting trip so he could observe his tactics first hand.

NP3 is one tough dude.  I understand his daily diet consists of wetland weeds and arcane HMB Zoning Ordinances.  He’s a mean, green ordinance eating machine.

NP3 and his legion of Property Rights Protectors have spent the past week retrofitting the GREEN BUS that was parked in a Miramar field as their eco-terrorism fighting vehicle.  They will be traveling up and down the PUDS at night looking for evil destroyers of property rights.  For homeowners living near PUDS,  they may hear the nightly chants of NO PUDS IN HMB.

The Grand Prize for NP3 is the thick and highly guarded volumes of Zoning Regulations at City Hall. This is not an easy target to get at.  It is guarded by a high speed revolving door with a stampede of City Top Brass coming and going.  To successfully penetrate this fortress of suppression of property rights,  NP3 has asked for help from engineers at Cal Tech and Top Terrorist Crusader,  Jack Bauer.

I hope to use NP3 and the NO PUDS IN HMB as the battle cry for the oppressed property owners here.  Over the coming weeks,  I hope to further develop this theme and our action hero.  My son yesterday set up nopudsinhmb.com blog site so property owners around the country can share their experiences and frustrations.

So to those people whether they be eco-terrorists, eco-perps, eco-jerks, eco-drunks, eco-jd’s, eco-wackos or just wimpy weed whiners,  destroying other’s property is not ok here.

On a serious note,  my previous post (not POST) on Talkabout skyrocketed to the 2nd most commented topic in just 8 days.  Its obvious that Property Right issues have legs (red of course) on the Coast.

Its not about a silly sign or self-promotion by a real estate broker,  its about your rights and how they have been systematically destroyed over the years by a series of misguided punishing policies.  Let’s make NO PUDS IN HMB and their action hero NP3 the battle cry for the oppressed property owners here on the Coast.

Perhaps something silly like this is needed to rally the forces against the failed and ruinous failed policies of the past.  What do you think?

Steven Hyman